A young security professional reached out to me recently for career guidance. He was deliberating whether to stay in his current position or return to a former agency. He had a list of grievances with his present situation and a list of perceived benefits of returning to where he had been before.
When he asked for my advice, I posed a simple question: "Are you still you?"
The question gave him pause – which was exactly what I hoped for. After a moment of genuine reflection, he affirmed that yes, he was still the same person. My response was direct: a new job will not bring peace or fulfillment or whatever he envisions as happiness.
The underlying issue was clear to me. This young professional had not undertaken serious self-evaluation. He lacked understanding of a fundamental question – his own identity. Without that self-knowledge, changing employers would prove futile. The same organizational environment and personnel dynamics remain constant regardless of where you work. Should he return, the novelty would eventually fade, replaced by the familiar dissatisfaction and disillusionment at perceived injustices. The root cause was seeking external validation – the approval of others. This does not satisfy.
Instead, I recommended genuine self-examination – what I call "the forging." The forging process delivers a very strong product, but first, the material must survive the intense pressure and heat. Just as metal requires pounding and heat to achieve strength, individuals must endure psychological pressure and discomfort to develop true resilience.
The outcome produces individuals who possess self-knowledge and understand their purpose. They achieve genuine strength – the ability to face their reflection and declare: "I know you, I know what you have been through, I know what you can handle, and I do not need the approval of others."
Live with courage -